Joys of old age..? 15 2 28 (12) 25 1 23

There are many joys about growing old but the one I wish to focus on today is the one which brings us into closer proximity to who we really are...Like all those earlier years go by without us taking the time to think and ponder this bigger question...

But today is the anniversary of my parents’ belated wedding day. I say belated because in reality I guess their real wedding took place 3 months earlier when my older brother Jim was conceived. How do I know this? Because Jim was born 6 months to the day after their formally taking marriage vows...

And if that were insufficient evidence to describe these goings on a year after pledging their love for one another in a formal wedding ceremony with Jim's best man Charley Harvey and Alice's bridesmaid Charlie's daughter and everything, I have worked it out that I was probably conceived on the first anniversary of their special day, my birth being 9 months later in the last days of November that same year.

Well, like any other couple it wasn't all plain sailing for J and A, like when J announced he was going off to fight in the Spanish Civil War against Franco's fascist forces A told him not to bother coming back, pregnant as she was at the time with his unborn first child. But later when I got my first serious girl-friend and perhaps wished to repeat the experiences of my parents with a little bit of prenuptial fun, the girl in question ran a mile because her own parents had made that very same mistake and ended up having to live with the guilt for the rest of their lives. A timely call for me, because there was no guilt about such matters where I came from, and I decided I should hoof it too … hahaha!

Of course until recently it hadn't really registered that my parents got married on this day, nor any of the associated supposing about other stuff… whilst after a long life spent in industry without the time to spit out half the time it is only now that I have the time to sit back and think about such trivia some would have it, but in my case it is nice to reflect on how much better I know about some aspects of my parents’ lives now than during their lifetimes. And when in discussions by phone with my granddaughters who live abroad when they ask how did their Famor = father’s mother and I meet why I find myself making it a priority to write that particular chapter of my autobiography now rather than later…

It is also intriguing to reflect on many of those friendships one had when one was younger, which as one ages simply cease to further exist, like when for example they decide perhaps that you got so much more out of your life than they did and their resentment drives them to jettison your once healthy friendship. Then it requires the passage of time for one to see these things in their proper light. Or the example of the friend who was never able to settle properly with just one woman, but each woman in his life would become the new love of his life, better than all those that came before, only for a few months to elapse when a fresh direction would be sought. The last time he wrote advising me that now (in his old age) he was about to get married again and move to Oregon from Scotland, leaving his married daughter and her husband and their four daughters, his granddaughters, for a new life in the new world, which couldn't have lasted more than a few months, to the extent he hasn't been in touch since that time 2 or 3 years ago unwilling to lose face yet again. And if this be a rather sad example to quote, I hope nevertheless it graphically illustrates the point that sometimes it takes time to know one’s self and to know others. Have a good day everybody as I hope you find joy in your old age too when it comes around..?

Pics today 1) two noisy Blackbirds in the bushes yesterday as i walked home after my swim, normally unheard of hereabouts so early in the year, and 2) the view from my study showing exceptionally how spring appears to be just around the corner...